SHERLOCK: Every Episode Ranked – #13-#7


Sherlock has proven to be one of the greatest TV dramas, either domestic or from across the pond. With a unique 90-minute episode format, though there are only 3 episodes a season, each is basically a feature length movie. Sherlock recently aired the its fourth and possibly final season, for a total of only 13 episodes. This makes the series one of the easier shows to rank in its entirety, to which I have no objections!

For the uninitiated, the BBC program Sherlock takes classic stories and characters from Arthur Conan Doyle’s original work and updates them for the modern world. Sherlock Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch) uses cell phones and twitter, John Watson (Martin Freeman) blogs their adventures, and Mycroft Holmes (co-creator Mark Gatiss) is thin due to new age diets . Updating Sherlock Holmes for the 21st Century may sound like a mistake, but thanks to incredible actors, high production values, and writers nearly as brilliant as Sherlock himself, the series is certainly the most essential adaptation of the one of fictions greatest characters.

Let’s explore these 13 episodes of Sherlock, ranking them from “Decent” to “Perfection.”

There will be Spoilers ahead!

13. ‘The Blind Banker’ – Season 1, Episode 2the-blind-bakerSherlock grabbed everyone’s attention from the very first episode in 2010. The being said, the first season is by far the weakest, starting and finishing strong, but lagging in the second episode. ‘The Blind Baker’ continues the fascinating updates to the characters and fun visual flairs such as the way Sherlock Holmes’ deductions are visually explored, but the writing just isn’t as clever as in Episode 1. The mystery is forgettable, and unlike most episodes, there is no development/evolution of Sherlock’s abilities. ‘The Blind Banker’s only saving grace is a brief hint at Moriarty, with a simple assassination and a card that reads ‘M.’

12. ‘The Empty Hearse’ – Season 3, Episode 1sherlock_s03e01_1080p_kissthemgoodbye_net_1719‘The Empty Hearse’ is another episode with a forgettable mystery.  This major flaw is partially counteracted by the 1st act, in which Sherlock reveals to John that he faked his death, only to be pummeled by the good Doctor.  The plethora of ridiculous conspiracy theories for how Sherlock survived his fall also makes for some very amusing Sherlock moments. But alas, the 1st act is not enough to save the 60 minutes that follow.

11. ‘The Hounds of Baskerville’ – Season 2, Episode 2hounds-of-baskerville‘The Hound of Baskerville’ starring Basil Rathbone is surely the most famous adaptation of a Sherlock Holmes novel, but in Season 2, creators Mark Gatiss and Steven Moffat decided to take another crack at it. The episode is only one of two that has supernatural elements, that is until they are revealed to be  a combination of tricks and science by Mr. Holmes. The way the episode approaches the modern twist isn’t my favorite, and there is no strong adversary for Holmes to face, making for what I consider to be one of the stranger and less balanced episodes.

10. ‘The Six Thatchers’ – Season 4, Episode 1Sherlock - early releaseThough it features a game-changing moment for the series that ushers in the dark tone and high stakes of Season 4, ‘The Six Thatchers’ has several deficiencies that detract from the episode. It does start strong with a wonderful mini-mystery that only creators Mark Gatiss and Steven Moffat could concoct involving a burned up car with a hidden body. Unfortunately, once the six Thatcher busts are smashed, Sherlock shifts a little too far into 007 territory, losing sight of what makes the series great. Bogged down in flashbacks, ‘The Six Thatchers’ just isn’t as clever as it thinks it is. 

9. ‘A Study in Pink’ – Season 1, Episode 1726ec97540fbThe episode that started it all, ‘A Study in Pink,’ is a fairly straight-forward adaption of Doyle’s story, ‘A Study in Scarlet.’ Though Sherlock’s opponent isn’t as prolific as in the episodes that follow, this list has finally reached the episodes with memorable mysteries!

Who doesn’t like an origin story? This is it; the meeting of legends Sherlock Holmes and his new flatmate and partner in Detective work, John Watson. The high functioning sociopath Sherlock slowly begins to soften through his budding friendship with the empathetic John Watson. Numerous characters that we will fall in love with are introduced, including newcomer Molly Hooper (Louise Brealey) and classic characters like Mrs. Hudson (Una Stubbs) and  Greg Lestrade (Rupert Graves). The most fun is the introduction of series stand-out Mycroft Holmes, used as a Moriraty fake-out. This is also obviously the 1st time we see “Sherlock Vision;” those visual cues that define the show in every episode that follows. 

8. ‘The Abominable Bride’ – Holiday Special (between Seasons 3 & 4)maxresdefault‘The Abominable Bride’ is an episode of Sherlock unlike any other, set in Victorian London instead of the 21st Century. A highlight is how the origin story is quickly repeated, closer to the original text, without the twists and updates introduced in ‘A Study in Pink.’ Initially, this episode appears to be stand-alone and not Canon, but in the end the mystery of Moriarty’s apparent “survival” after a self-inflicted bullet to the head is examined through the lens of a century old case. The most exciting scene of the episode happens at the real Reichenbach Falls, the location that Moriary and Sherlock fall to their death in Arthur Conan Doyle’s original story, ‘The Adventure of the Final Problem.’

7. ‘The Sign of Three’ – Season 3, Episode 2mast-sherlock-s3-ep2-synopsis-hiresIn ‘The Sign of Three’ Sherlock solves a mystery in the most unique and fun way yet, as part of a never-ending wedding toast for Watson and his bride Mary (Amanda Abbington). It’s not just the levity and humor surrounding the setting of Sherlock’s deductions that I love; ‘The Sign of Three’ also presents Sherlock’s process in the most visually pleasing and groundbreaking manor in the series. Sherlock profiles potential killers in his “Mind Palace,” including a Court Room of the mind. Balancing humor with a fun mystery, ‘The Sign of Three’ begins the greatest episodes of Sherlock!

But, which episode will be #1? Find out now in ‘The Top 6 Episodes of Sherlock!’

8 (Days) Of TV’s Best Christmas Specials Of The 21st Century!


Welcome to a very special episode of Breaking Geek: A Breaking Geek Christmas!

I’m not a very merry guy; I hate Christmas music, movies, and TV shows, though I do love getting free shit. My favorite “Christmas” movies are simply films set on Christmas, including Lethal Weapon and Die Hard. I especially hate those “Very Special Christmas” episodes nearly every series forces out every year, like a Christmas turd. I’m tired of watching families and friends coming together for a disgustingly sweet episode, all their worries and conflict gone for just one week of a Season.

These 8 Christmas Specials are more my speed;  Less cheer, more cynicism and darkness. My kind of Christmas.

There are NO SPOILERS ahead, just enough info to get you excited about these very unique Christmas specials.

8. Black Mirror, ‘White Christmas’ (2014) – Available on NetflixBlack Mirror White Christmas Jon HammBlack Mirror is an anthology show, like The Twilight Zone, known for its twisted and dark interpretation of the not-so-distant future where the horrors of technology have gone awry. ‘White Christmas,’ is perhaps the most disturbing episode of the entire series, wrapped up in colorful paper and a pretty bow. After living in an isolated cabin for five years, Matt (Jon Hamm) and Potter (Rafe Spall) share the horror stories that drove them into isolation over a Christmas meal. I can’t go into greater detail without spoiling the episode, but the gist of it is that the the two men find themselves alone on Christmas because because they were literally “Blocked” in real life. Something much darker is lingering under the surface, waiting to be revealed. Perhaps the scariest Christmas special you will ever see!

7. It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia, ‘A Very Sunny Christmas’ (2009) – Amazon PrimeA Very Sunny Christmas The Gang With PresentsSpeaking of Christmas specials that aren’t so merry, ‘A Very Sunny Christmas’ offers the same cynicism and asshole characters you expect It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. The gang never ends up in a happy place in any other episode, so why should Christmas be any different?

In this episode, longer and Rated R, Dennis (Glenn Howerton) and Dee (Kaitlin Olson) try to teach their father Frank (Danny DeVito) a lesson about Christmas after he ruined all their perfect Christmas gifts in childhood by keeping them for himself. Meanwhile, Charlie (Charlie Day) and Mac (Rob McElhenney) try to set things right with a neighbor who’s gifts Mac’s family stole during his childhood. This episode is the 1st to delve into all of the characters’ history, featuring child versions of Charlie, Mac, Dee and Dennis! ‘A Very Sunny Christmas’ has Charlie brutally attacking a Mall Santa Claus, due to the fact men dressed as Santa would fuck his Mom every Christmas, a gory stop-motion sequence in the vein of Frosty The Snowman, and Frank being sown into a couch, only to emerge sweaty and naked. And the gang learns nothing… not even about Christmas.

6. Sherlock, ‘The Abominable Bride’ (Jan 1st, 2016) – Amazon PrimeSherlock: The Abominable Bride Christmas SpecialReady for a Christmas mystery? Though billed at a Christmas special, like in Die Hard and Lethal Weapon, Christmas is more of a setting than a theme in ‘The Abominable Bride.’ Rather than being set in modern day like the rest of the series, ‘The Abominable Bride’ takes place in the late 1800’s, with more classic interpretations of Holmes (Benedict Cumberbatch) and Watson (Martin Freeman). Sherlock investigates the case of a Bride rising from the dead to kill her husband, relating to the modern mystery of how Moriarty (Andrew Scott) can possibly return from death after a self inflicted bullet to the head. Too dark for Christmas? Not at all! Elementary, my dear reader.

5. Curb Your Enthusiasm, ‘Mary, Jospeh and Larry’ (2002)Joseph, Mary and Larry Curb Your Enthusiasm Christmas There’s a pubic hair stuck in Larry David’s throat! Cheryl wants to buy a Christmas Tree for their Jewish household! Larry’s housekeeper won’t keep her mouth shut about his private plans! Larry covers for Jeff when Susie finds out about some late night phone calls! Christmas tipping goes awry when Larry accidentally tips the same guy twice at the Club and his housekeeper finds out the gardener received more Christmas money! Larry’s in-laws (including Kaitlin Olsen, from Always Sunny) invade his house, bringing a ginger bread manger of which Larry eats the baby Jesus and his virgin mother Mary! It’s amazing how much material Curb Your Enthusiasm can fit into the 1st 11 minutes of a 30 minute episode. As it always goes on Curb Your Enthusiasm, all these events collide and things continue to spiral out of control as Larry attempts to fix everything, only to ruin Christmas for everyone. Typical brilliant Curb episode that’s more naughty than nice.

4. Arrested Development, ‘Afternoon Delight’ (2004)Arrested Development Afternoon Afternoon Delight Christmas SpecialSky rockets in flight, Afternoon Delight! Leave it to Arrested Development, my favorite TV show of all time, to tie a surprisingly dirty song and marijuana (a strain named Afternoon Deelight) to Christmas. GOB (Will Arnett), currently the president of the Bluth Company, starts wearing his father’s $60,000 suit (“Come On!”) and sets out to provide his depressed employees with a great Christmas party! As always happens when GOB is in charge, everything falls apart and it’s up to his brother Michael (Jason Bateman) to put everything back together. Featuring Micheal singing the poorly chosen ‘Afternoon Delight’ with his niece, the first appearance of the Banana Suit, and a very stoned Lucille Bluth (Jessica Walters), this expertly written episode contains some of the most classic moments from the groundbreaking series.

3. South Park, ‘Woodland Critter’s Christmas’ (2004) – Hulu, SouthParkStudios.comSouth Park Woodland Critter's Christmas Stan and Animals“Hail, Satan!”

The best of the many South Park Christmas episodes, ‘Woodland Critter Christmas’ features rhyming narration, in the style of Dr. Seuss, driving Stan through the story while outright contradicting his words and feelings on the matter. After killing a mountain lion to ensure the immaculate conception of the virgin Porkupiney the porkupine, Stan quickly learns these adorable animals’ savior is actually the spawn of Satan. After all, who else would have sex with a porcupine? After witnessing their sacrifice of Rabbitty the Rabitt and the ensuing Blood Orgy, Stan must teach the mountain lion cubs how to preform an abortion to save us all. It wouldn’t be South Park without a Blood Orgy, right? Definitely the most inappropriate Christmas episode you’ll find anywhere!

2. Community, Regional Holiday Music (2011) – HuluCommunity Regional Holiday Music Christmas SpecialCommunity CRUSHES it with its Christmas episodes. In season 3, Community brings the Holiday Cheer with original Christmas songs, dissing the now forgotten show Glee in the process. After Jeff (Joel McHale) shuts down Greendale’s Glee Club by reporting them for using unlicensed music, Glee Club Instructor Cory Radison (Taran Killam, SNL), or “Mr. Rad,” recruits the study group to fill in for the Glee Club for a 2nd time (the last Glee Club died in a bus crash). Of course, none of them want to be involved, as their last experience was like “being on Ecstasy.” Abed (Danny Pudi), well intentioned and always seeking a perfect Christmas, is seduced by Mr. Rad’s infectious singing and goes on to spread the cheer (or glee) across the study group through songs. The songs include one about glee, a rap from Troy (Donald Glover aka the rapper Childish Gambino) about being a Jehovah’s Witness that was merely pretending to be into Christmas, and Annie’s (Alison Brie) sexy parody of ‘Santa Baby.’ As with all the specials on this list, certain revelations lead to a dark ending, without glee. And to think, “they were this close to Regionals!”

Abed: What if you were a Jehovah’s witness

That was merely pretending to be into Christmas?

Gathering clues and blending in

To take down the holidays from within?

Troy: You mean like a spy investigating?

Making it seem like I’m celebrating- when actually I’m infiltrating Santa’s operation?

Troy: YOIP! Going deep cover past enemy lines,

Making everybody think I’m on the christ-a-mas side,

Rockin’ warm sweaters,

Hangin’ big ass lights,

If the fat man could see me yo it’s gotta look right

I’ll watch all the TV specials that I never could,

I’ll even cry during the sad ones like James Bond would

And when the big night comes it’s time to set the bait,

Cold milk, hot cookies,

Decorative plates!

And he’ll come down the chi-muh-ney

And it will be just him and me

But he won’t know we’re enemies ’cause I’ll play sincere

Bring a trap, like that,

Hug him tight, get on his lap

And tell him he can come back every year.

‘Cause I am Jehovah’s most secret witness

So I might have to dedicate my life to Christmas

And act just like I love it ’til the day I die!

Abed: A-B-E-D

Connoisseur of Christmas

On the spectrum?

None of your business

Thoughts too fast to comprehend

Just wanna do right

By my friend

If years were seasons, this December

Would be the December

Of our December

More blueprints than Howard Hughes,

But if there are blueprints,

How do we choose?

We have to be happy to get to the end,

We have to save Christmas to save our friends–

Both: We have to save Christmas to save our friends,

We have to save Christmas to save our friends!

1. Community, ‘Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas’ (2010)Community Abed's Uncontrollable ChristmasThis episode is truly the most magical Christmas special of all time! A season before ‘Regional Holiday Music,’ Community delivers another wholly original musical, this time in a glorious, fully animated, stop-motion episode. Paying homage to Rudolf the Rednose Reindeer and The Nightmare Before Christmas (my other favorite “Christmas” movie), ‘Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas’ explores the source of the mental breakdown which has Abed seeing the whole world in claymation. It includes Willy Wonka-esque songs ejecting members of the study group from Abed’s dangerous hallucinations one at a time. The episode even features a remote control Christmas pterodactyl and the line, “Somewhere Tim Burton just got a boner.” Sincerely dark like every special on this list, this ending does provides the most Christmas cheer.

Make haste, there’s not a moment to waste! Only a little over a month to check out all these unconventional Christmas classics.